Tommy & Jack
by ColdSideOfTheWorld
Summary: Tommy Conlon's life after Sparta and his prison time. (I dont own Warrior or the character Tommy Conlon, the only thing I own are the ideas around Jacqueline (Jack) Hart and some new names in the story)
1. New Discovery's

There is more than enough hatred to go around in this world; we all share a common enemy: each other. He knew this, even after his father's passing and his prison sentence finished Tommy had the same inbred hatred floating in his veins. This followed back to the drugs and the alcohol, the abuse wasn't as difficult to kick as first time, but it still made him flinch each time he saw a bottle of whiskey or visited a friend and saw their prescription pain killers in the bathroom cabinet.

Who was he kidding? Tommy didn't have any friends, he had his brother and every time Tommy visited his nieces they hid every item of drugs around the house: even the nail varnish removers. Seeing this was a house populated mostly by women, Tommy found it amusing when realizing they had cleared them out, for his sake. He loved his niece's, that's whom he did this for, the sobering up, for them and for his best friend: Jack, or Jacqueline.

Tommy's days where meaningful now, before they just entailed in him going to the gym, eating, fighting with his father, training some more, then being so exhausted that he passed out on his bed, not moving until the next day.

Paddy, or Patrick, his father had passed while Tommy was serving his prison sentence; this was about two and a half years ago. In his youngest son's best favor Paddy had left Tommy his childhood home, not to Brendan, his eldest, whom he left his beloved "Lucy" a blue Caddy.

Also in some cases Paddy joked about that Brendan was conceived in the back seat. This was never denied or confirmed, but still Brendan kept the car in his garage, where Tommy spends some time before dinner smoking cigarette's thinking about old memories with his mother and father.  
He had no good memories of his father, but he had more then he could handle of his mother. It left him teary eyed after the cigarette was smoked and before Tess hollered that dinner was ready.

Tommy's life was good, his days where rich in a number of things: he had moved in with Jack after his prison sentence was done, she was his pen pal in prison, an assignment she got for school. Jack studied law, which meant she was gone most of the days, either at the study halls or at work; she worked as a waitress in a small diner just down town. It was a bus ride away from her university. NYU, that's where Tommy had moved to, with Jack, he needed the change and she loved New York, just for being New York.

To Tommy it wasn't very different from Pittsburgh where he had grown up, it had its drug dealers, that smell of fumes and fog, the night sky cleared up, but you never saw it, you never saw the stars like you could in Pittsburgh. Brendan worried for him, with Tommy's new training job, he worried that his brother would find it too much, especially so shortly after their father's passing, to Brendan two years was like two weeks, Tommy always knew that Brendan could never understand, he needed this, he needed to be in the rings, sweating, jabbing, hitting, grunting and laying people down on their knees, it was the only peace felt since Manny's death.

The job helped, he got some money send to Manny's wife Pilar, each month, a nice fat check of 560 bucks, it was a good better half of Tommy's pay, but it was worth it, he kept his promise to Manny, to take care of her.

After work he would stop by Jack's diner to get a cup of coffee. Jack always nagged him on dating, she cared, he knew, but he wasn't ready, it had been years since he had slept with anyone.

Tommy pondered over it while sipping off a white cup, filled with black liquid: coffee, and observing the waitresses around the diner, they where all good looking women, some were married, other's single, a girl that worked with Jack: Mary, had hit on Tommy a couple of times, he was unknowing of this until Jack pointed it out to him.

Tommy would sit at Jack's table, he knew her schedule by heart, but Mary would always beg and plead Jack to let her have her table, the one Tommy was sitting at.  
-"I swear to God, if you don't screw Mary, she will start stalking you" Jack laughed, while plunging her body on the other side of the booth Tommy was sitting at, she looked over at Mary, -"She keeps asking for you again" and waved at her fellow collogue.  
Tommy just grinned at her, sipping some more off his coffee, -"I can't help it, my dad always said it was the Conlon charm" Jack made a face at him –"Damn, I suddenly feel super attracted to you" she grinned at him, bending a bit over the table, -"Nice and hard, ey?"  
Tommy's grinning and cocky behavior quickly turned back to being embarrassed, he had watched Jack most of the days she paraded around their small apartment in only her University T and some colored panties, she was a small girl, but she had curves, her breasts where plump and her hips where wide, he liked that about women, how feminine they could look naturally. Jack didn't even know it, she always complained about being too fat, but to him, she was perfect, he never told her though, Tommy didn't want to make the wrong impression and he sure as hell didn't need to lose her just because he was attracted to her body.

–"You're thinking about it, you shameless dog" Jack's laugher interrupted his train of thought, and she was right, he was picturing her walking around in that Uni T, with her butt moving with every step she took, her hips rolling and those small patches of her lower back peeking out just as she bend up too take a cup or a dish from the cabinet.

-"Now you're just being nasty" Tommy corrected her, still with his cheeks burning, he didn't usually get embarrassed, he didn't get flustered, he was 32 years old, she was 25, how could someone below his age range, probably with less experience in the bedroom make him blush like he was 12 again.  
Jack had experience though, sometimes at night Tommy would turn the volume of the TV down to listen in on her and Ruby's conversations, Ruby was Jack's big sister, they would have the most strangest conversations, one of them being on Jack's suitors, Jack liked smart and thoughtful men, but she always ended up with jackasses, which was the main theme of Ruby and her's conversation's every now and again.  
She was young, that's all Tommy thought, and he remembered being 25, in the army still, right before Manny died, it was the best years of his life, with his marine family.

-"Seriously though, Tommy, it's time" Jack said without a smile this time, she had occupied herself with pouring some sugar into the barrels of salt, she did it to piss her boss off, it made him grin, she was malicious.

-"Again, Jack, for the billionth time, I don't work like you do, I can't pick someone up and sleep with them"

Jack rolled her eyes, -"Christ sakes man" she let the sugar shakers go and looked up at him,  
-"Look, you haven't had sex for five years now, I mean, there is only so much hand crème I can buy, Tommy, and I'm running low on tissues" her lips where trying not to form that conning smile of her's, but he saw it, she was teasing him.

-"You know very well, I'm not the one that does stuff like that"  
-"Just because you found a vibrator in my room, doesn't mean I use it" she said crossing her arms, it made him blush again, he found a pink vibrator under her bed while vacuuming a week ago, he had tried putting it back, but got lost in his mind, right before she opened the door and caught him holding it.

-"Would you like a flesh light maybe?" she asked tilting her head to the side, now she was really degrading him, on purpose, Tommy didn't even know what the hell that was, not that he wanted to know. There was just a side of Jack that Tommy wanted to explore, on the other hand he didn't, he was afraid of going too far.

-"Maybe we should have sex, if you don't want to have sex with Mary?" now she had dragged it too far, but all Tommy wanted to scream was: oh, yes, please, let's go.  
-"Shut the fuck up, Jack" was the only words that came out of his mouth, and then the dead silence, before she broke out in one of her laughing fits, this caught her managers eye, he casted a very angry glance over at their table, that shut Jack up for real.

-"That's my cue" she grinned then walked back to her post, to serve some men that had come in as a group. Tommy followed her hips as they swayed, the cheerful step in her walk, like she wasn't walking over to a table filled with assholes, but a table filled with laughter and jokes.

Tommy never saw the world the way Jack did, it was just hatred and only that alone, it shot him in the gut when he saw one of the guys slapping Jack's ass, she just laughed it off and wrote on her pad what they wanted to order.

Jack had been Tommy's anchor for quite some time, she got his sentence pulled for the desertion, she got him off and the army even gave him a medal for saving all those men back when he was fleeing from his quarter.

It wasn't something he was proud of, even the medal meant nothing, he had given it to him niece Emily, she was more than happy to get it and show it off to her class even.  
Tommy looked back at his cup, thinking of all of the nights Jack had to force feed him coffee to keep him awake, hold his head back while he threw up all of the poison he had previously swallowed; he didn't understand why she stuck around for so long.

Jack had a family, she had a perfect 5 by 5 family, two older sisters, a mother and a father, Tommy had only a brother, which he hardly spoke to since he moved to New York two years ago, only at Christmas he would show up, give the girls presents, see their faces light up when he got them exactly what they wanted. The money he worked for, he worked really hard for, at night he would take up arranged fights in the gym he worked at, this was illegal, but it was good money, one fight 400 bucks, he would knock the guys out even before they touched him.

Sometimes they would snag a shot, punching him in the nose or the jaw, and then he would get Jack to patch him up, putting an icepack on his hands while her eyes curiously looking at the cuts on his face.  
Jack would compliment him on his good affords instead of lecturing him, she would light him a cigarette and herself one, asking him to tell her all about the fight. Then Jack would ask him nicely if he could take her with him next time he fought, but he knew better then that. If she saw him at that level of violence, she would regret springing him from jail and send him right back, or worse, she wouldn't be able to look at him the same way again.

Jack's curvy body bent over the counter of the diner, she was grabbing a fork and some knives: he needed to stop looking at her in this matter. It might have just been the sexual frustration talking or just him talking, he didn't know anymore. All he knew was that he wanted to look after Jack; he wanted to take care of her in the same way she had taken care of him; helped him with his rehabilitation, gotten him a place to stay with her, even pitched in more on rent every month so he had a place to stay.

Jack was amazing in Tommy's eyes.  
He picked up a news paper, trying not to noticed as they were cleaning up the diner, Jack had spilled some water on her white uniform, it showed out her breasts and the blue laced bra underneath. Tommy had never lived with women before, he had lived with his mother, but that was different, she didn't wear laced underwear, Chloe perfume or play sad Cat Power songs, she didn't share her period pains, or show him clothing options for dates: asking him if he thought this dress was sexy or this one.

No, Tommy was very glad his mother was nothing like Jack, he shook his head at the disturbing thoughts of his mother in underwear. Jack was free, she was something Tommy had never been near to understand, her laughter crossed his thoughts again, she was guiding the men that where their last costumers out of the diner, they had tipped her very well, more then she deserved.

-"Look at this" she grinned and popped the 50 dollar bill they had given her,  
-"And I didn't even need to lose any clothing for this" he pride was almost too much to take for him, she had told him about her previous life choices, Jack used to be a burlesque dancer, it was a honorable job, only to Tommy he had the worst scenarios in his head of dingy underground clubs, low lighting, fat, disgusting grabby handed men that drooled and got boner by the very sight of the girl Tommy was now looking at.

He was jealous, it was a new feeling for him, it appeared a month ago when she started dating a guy called Derek, he was a broker and the guy was a dick, just how Jack preferred them.

-"That's great, Jack" he brushed her comment off looking at the newest zodiac signs, he hated the fucking zodiac, Tommy noticed how her smile didn't disappear, you had to do a lot more to Jack then that.

-"We're gonna eat well tonight" she skipped when they got out on the hot summer streets of New York, it was the beginning of June, summer had come early this year, which made the air-condition in their small flat impossible to use, resulting and explaining why Jack was walking around half naked.

Tommy included, he would take off his shirt, walking around in his wife beater with his tattooed sleeves, Jack had tattoos just like him, except for her's where on her thighs and arms, she preferred them there, she used to say how else am I suppose to see them.

-"Where would you like to go" she asked him, hooking an arm around his, looking up at him with those sparkling hazel eyes, letting her brown hair fall over her shoulders.  
-"I don't know, Chinese?" he really had no idea, he was trying to cope with the fact that her breast was pressing against his arm, she gave out a small sigh, making him wonder if that's what it sounds like when she use's that pink vibrator of hers.

-"Alright then, I'll get shitloads of fortune cookies for Obi"  
-"Cats don't eat fortune cookies" Tommy frowned, Jack had taken in a black and brown stray cat a year ago and the furry bastard had gotten a name and even a collar now, Tommy didn't hate animals, he enjoyed dogs, but never cats, they just seemed shady.

-"Damn, you are deciding everything tonight, I kinda like this new side of you" she teased,  
-"Maybe you might get lucky" her hand struck on his stomach as she turned to him and moved it down to his pants, Tommy grabbed it and pulled it away, -"Give it a rest, Jack"

She made another face then nodded her head, -"For later then" her brows rose in a teasing kind of way.  
She was torturing him all the way through dinner too, they had picked a small Chinese restaurant close by china town, it was the best on noodles, meanwhile Tommy wasn't paying any attention to the food, he was too busy noticing how Jack's naked leg was swaying back and forth as she talked to him about some job related stuff he couldn't be bother listening too.

At one point he had to excuse himself to go to the bathroom, he had gotten a hard on, it was the worst fucking moment to get one, right before they were about to pay the check and Jack would probably think that Tommy couldn't pay for his share, but he could, he wanted to, instead, he had to think of every disgusting thing possible to get this fucking thing between his legs not to react to Jacks swaying white soft skinned leg and plump breasts.

After he got out of the bathroom, he saw that she had her bag of fortune cookies in one hand and a smile around her lips, she had paid the bill. He felt whatever was left of his arousal disappear, he was irritated, not at her, but at himself. Also she had been right all along, he needed to sleep with someone, this would never work for long, he couldn't masturbate this want from his bones, he needed human flesh, he needed the warmth and worst of all he wanted it all from Jack.


	2. What The Body Wants

A week after the boner incident, Tommy had decided to go on a date with Mary, she was a very nice girl, she kept her mouth closed most of the date, it didn't leave much room for conversation he thought as he was walking her home.

She stopped outside her typical New York apartment entrance: steep stairs and a black door, walking up those steps Tommy felt the rush return to his blood, he knew what was coming, he knew he would kiss her, then she would invite him in, and then they would fuck. It was standard.

-"Thanks for the date" she smiled, Tommy nodded his head, she leaned in and here it goes he thought, but instead, he saw Jack's laughing face and those words of hers; "nice and hard".  
He jerked back, looking at the poor confused Mary, she was expecting, kissing, groping and not to mention sex, -"Thanks for having me" he nodded his head, putting his hands in his jacket pockets, hurrying down the steep stairs, not looking back, but he could sense her, he could sense upset, confused Mary even when he turned the corner.

Back at home, Tommy thought nobody was there, but there was, Jack was on the sofa with a bowl of ice cream and what he could hear was a documentary of the second world war playing on TV. She was upset too, he took his jacket off, hoping she wouldn't notice when he walked behind her on the sofa.

She let out a small and desperate shriek crying into the spoon she had in her mouth, on TV they were talking about how many Jews were killed during the war.  
-"Hey, you alright?" Tommy asked, regretting it already, she turned her head, she was a mess, a right adorable mess, with her hair up in a bun, that typical Uni T on her and no pants or make-up, Jack was beautiful without make-up, she didn't wear a lot on a daily basis, but when she didn't wear any, you could see the youthfulness of her skin and the innocence's of her looks.

-"Derek is fucking someone else" she sobbed while turning around, Tommy's brows arched; he didn't know if he was suppose to congratulate her or comfort her.  
-"I'm sorry" he said while sitting down on the sofa, scooping her up in his arms, she was tiny, he could feel her ribs under the touch of his fingers, she bundled up into his side looking at the TV, -"Those poor Jewish people"

-"Why can't you just watch normal sappy chick flick like other girls, when they get dumped" Tommy laughed, then realized how cruel he sounded, she backed herself up a little from his arm, he wanted to pull her back again: apologize, kiss her, undress her and make love to her there and then, but instead she broke down crying, she was sobbing her eyes out, it was painful to watch, -"You fucking asshole" she stood up, ready to run to her own room.

-"I'm sorry" he put his hands up trying to get a hold of her arms, and he managed, she fell on his lap and he held her down, -"I'm sorry, I'm an ass, I didn't mean it that way, I was trying to be sarcastic and it came out mean, I'm sorry" he buried his still not shaved chin in between her shoulder blades, breathing her in, she smelled of cigarettes, soap and that soft scent of vanilla, probably from her shampoo.

-"Why do you have to be so fucking cruel" she hissed trying to get away from him, but he just squeezed harder around her curvy body, until she stopped, and he knew why she stopped, it had happened again, oh lord have mercy he thought, they both looked down at lap, then at each other,  
-"I'm sorry, oh fuck, I'm sorry" he let her go at once, not holding her back anymore, but Jack had stopped crying, she was now just looking at him curious. –"Did you just get a hard on?"

Tommy wanted to push her off his lap, he felt so stupid, like he was fifteen again, now at this point he had no excuse to run to the bathroom, she had felt it. Jack dried her tears with the back of her hands then turned around to straddle, not saying anything.

The redness of Jacks face and the innocent look of confusion was in Tommy's view, she was beautiful even teary eyed and upset. He painted out a soft smile before tracing his hands up both her thighs, feeling the softness he had seen in those milky white legs of hers.

He glided his hands all the way up until he felt her hip bones, grabbing a hold of them and pulling her in close, Jack's hands placed on his wide shoulders, they just sat there with the Second World War playing in the background. Tommy observed her puffy face, with those hazel eyes making themselves into a dark green shade, reflecting to him.

She bit her bottom lip, contemplating her move, he had never seen her so struck before, and Jack always knew what to do with other guys. Her mouth opened, but closed again, back to biting her bottom lip.

-"I'm sorry" he whispered this apology.  
Jack swallowed, giving off a soft "hmf" to him as an understanding that she got him.

-"I'm sorry for the" he couldn't finish the sentence, she smiled, nodding her head, focusing her eyes on his lips, leaning in, it shot through him like some kind of tingle when her lips found his, no tongues, just slow, wet, soft lips mashing against each other, Jack scooped herself closer to Tommy, braiding her fingers in the back of his hair, tracing it gently to pull him more harder to her mouth.

Scotching her knees up the sofa pillows so that her lowers parts mashed up with his boner, he felt her grinding up against him, but not in a violent obvious way, in a soft and careful way, hocusing his erection to it peek, she moaned when his hands traveled further from her hips to her breasts, she wasn't wearing a bra, he grunted into her mouth when he came passed them. They were not too big, just enough to fit into his hands, they were pushing against his hands.

He pulled her shirt off, throwing it behind him. Pulling away a little, just to catch some air and to see what he had hoped for, all of her, he lay her down on her back on the sofa.  
Her breasts lay flat, and her stomach hollowed into her bones, he saw her hipbones clearer her rib bones, her legs spread wider, making room for him.

He grabbed a hold of her panties, pulling them all the way down, seeing the small patch of hair between her legs, she was well groomed and it made him smile remembering all of her many beauty products clouding up the bathroom.

Tommy pulled his shirt off along with his wife-beater, kicking off his shoes, dragging his pants and his boxers all together down, he was naked now, and throbbing, she gazed her tilted head at him, biting her lip again, like she had never seen nothing like it.

Tommy's hands on the top of her knees, gliding between her legs, supporting his weight with his arms on the small sofa so he wouldn't crush her, he felt the warmth of her as his erection lay above her entrance, Jack swallowed again, she was warm under his chest, legs clasping slowly over his back, like she was inviting him in, and she was, her hand followed slowly down to his boner, teasing it at her entrance, but he saw it in her eyes, it wasn't teasing, it was fear.

He pushed himself slowly into her, feeling the rise of her chest, she gasped quietly, he clutched himself onto the sides of the sofa, still fully connected to her, chest to chest, he stopped a little, adapting to her warmth, she was wet, warm and her hips moved in to him, like she was waiting for him to continue what he had started.

Her heels pressed gently into his buttocks and the warmth of his and her body as they moved, he kissed her, now with tongue, she moaned through the kissing as he leaned his head onto her shoulder, bracing himself, she nibbled and kissed at his neck, driving her fingertips over his thick back and giving off a short jerk to get even closer to his torso.  
-"Am I hurting you?" he whispered in her ear, -"No, just come closer" she almost pleaded digging her nails into his shoulders.

He let his arm that was supporting him go, leaning only on his elbows, their bodies where so close he could feel every moan and every gasp coming from her small frame.  
-"God, you feel so good" she moaned pushing her head back, when he thrusted harder into her, Tommy knew he couldn't hold it up like this for much longer, he was already ready to cum, but he wanted to wait for her so bad, he wanted to feel her muscles clench around him.

Hearing her gasping, he speeded up, thrusting just a bit harder, and when she gave out a small push with her hands tight on his shoulders trying to get away from him, he knew he had hit a nerve, he belted himself harder into her, holding her by her waistline now, as her legs dangled carelessly around his waist, he kissed her breasts moaning between them as he felt himself cum, he shuttered between her legs, trying to continue, but he knew it was pointless, with his forehead pressed against the top half of her chest, he stopped moving gasping to catch his breath.

Jack's hands where planted on the back of his head, playing with his hair, he didn't let her go until the shakes where gone, he was calm, trying his best to look up at her, she looked satisfied, happy almost, but he hadn't made her cum.

He kissed her again on the skin between her breasts, tracing kisses until he reached her hips, Jack didn't move, didn't say a word, just kept her hands on the back of his head.  
His tongue touched the top of her clit, she wasn't far from an orgasm when he started sucking gently on it, holding her legs steadily apart, they shaked, she clutched a hold onto his hair, not violently, but only enough to signal him that she was close and she was, she came, quietly, gasping, arching her back.  
Tommy kissed both of her inner thighs one kiss each, then laid back on top of her again, between her open legs, still holding some of his weight off her. His lips close to her neck and her hands on his back: stroking him softly.

The documentary on TV had ended, and the rolling titles where appearing on the TV.

They still didn't move, just laid there, he braided his fingers in hers letting her feel small in his big hands, Tommy gazed at the side of Jacks face; she was smiling while playing with his fingers. –"I'm not sorry for this" he said coyly, she turned her head to him, kissing his forehead once, -"Good, you where amazing"


	3. A New Morning

It was the smell of fresh coffee that woke him, and bare feet tapping across the wooden floor, the apartment was hotter than hell, as his face was pressed against the sofa pillow. He was naked, sweating and barely awake.

Jack was walking around the kitchen in nothing but her t-shirt, which she had to pick up from behind the sofa after Tommy had thrown it there.  
Last night had made her sore and stiff, he didn't know his own powers. She was resting a frozen pocket dinner between her thighs when he finally got up, staggering to the coffee, and not noticing her sitting on the kitchen counter.

-"God, this is good" he grunted after the first slurp, then peeked a gaze at Jack and her newest discovery, -"What are you doing?" he snorted and put the cup in the sink, in a way she radiated shame, she was actually ashamed.  
-"I'm hot" she mumbled putting the frozen dinner packet away to the side, Tommy stepped between her legs, putting his hands on inner legs, it was cold where the packet had been pushed against her skin.

-"Are you in pain?" his forehead was pressed against hers and she was pushing her body against his naked one, he noticed she wasn't wearing any panties, only the Uni t-shirt.  
Their heads pushed a little, as he grinned then bit her bottom lip, nibbling on it, Tommy couldn't understand the luck he had with finally getting Jack where he wanted her.

Last night was amazing, and her hands now on his naked back and her warm center pressing against his raising erection only showed that they would have a repeat.

-"Our apartment is hot, maybe you should take that off" he said, now with his hands on top of her thighs, she didn't protest when he removed the t-shirt, her body was the same as he had seen it last night, curvy by the looks of it, but thin to the touch.

They kissed, tongues rubbing, moaning in between breaths, he was hard all over again, he didn't even need her to touch him, all he needed was to look at her and it was there.  
His goal was clear this time, he would get her off with him inside of her, his hand guided itself between her legs, finding it wet and warm, she clutched onto his shoulders in a weak moan with her mouth open and her eyes still staring at him, waiting for what he would do next.

Tommy stopped his hand, only to have her jerking herself into it, he didn't hesitate to put two fingers into her at first, she was wet, tight and warm, her muscles clenching around his fingers.

-"You're being cruel again" she gasped when he put his thumb to her clit, massaging it slowly, still not moving his fingers anywhere. –"Tell me to stop then" he whispered into her ear biting her neck slowly as his other hand cupped her breast harder, she yelped out a little, he liked her like this, weak and wanting. Even if it made it extremely difficult for him to resist burying himself into her right away, he had to wait his turn.

-"Don't stop" she moaned leaning her head onto his shoulder, he felt her body freeze up, tense as his fingers moved, massaging moving in and out, -"Let me see your face" the murmur in his chest made her head move to obey him.  
She was breathing heavily, face flustered, hair a complete mess and her center still buried in his fingers,

-"God, Tommy" she moaned not being able to hold herself up in his gaze.  
He pulled his fingers out of her, she made a unsatisfied whimper, -"Don't stop"  
-"How bad do you want it" he teased as his hands gripped onto her thighs, reaching for her butt, sliding her into him, he guided his erection closer to her, but not before she put her hand small hand around it.

-"If you're gonna be mean" she grinned, and there she was Jack, like he knew her, she stroked him, slowly, his hands squeezed her butt pushing her to him, feeling their chests touch, she leaned back a little to let him slip into her, an -"Oh god" moaned out of Jack's lips as she rested her head on the cupboards door behind her, still her hands on Tommy's arms, clawing into him.

His eyes didn't move away from her or her body, the way he glided back in and out of her, giving off a hard jerk to her once and a while just to hear that whimper again.  
She lost control of his arms, grabbing onto anything around her, knocking over dishes, trying to reach for something else with her eyes rolled back, she was close he could feel her, clenching, squeezing around him, -"Harder" she begged, -"Please, harder" her eyes where hungry, not like last night, she folded her legs up to his torso so she could lay on the counter pressing her butt against his thighs, holding onto the other side of the kitchen counter.

Jack was stretched out again, Tommy did as she told, but he watched her as he plunged harder and harder into her, she didn't leave his gaze just moaned with her mouth open, some small "oh god" "please don't stop" and "fuck" left her lips.

His hands where on her hips again, guiding her harder and harder into him, her breasts where moving with every thrust, the harder he drove into her the more he heard those words, they filled his head, and he grunted, looking down between him and her, he was inside of her, completely, it hadn't hit him before, but it did now, they were connected, even if this was just fucking, it was good.

-"Tommy" she whimpered, with her arms above her head holding onto the kitchen counter, he had lost contact with her for a moment, she wanted him closer so his body draped itself over her as his hips still moved in and out of her.

He kissed her chest, she continued to claw at his back while he drove one hard thrust after another, into her. –"Fuck, fuck" she was cursing between her heavy breathing.

It stopped and she became quite and tried pushing herself a bit away from him, he knew she had cum she was clenching around him, this made him react and cum after, his body shuttered again, he felt weak on top of her, not just out of being exhausted or that the air in the apartment was heavy, because the air-condition didn't work, but because he had given himself to her twice now. Whatever this meant, he hoped it would mean the same to her.

-"Christ" she breathed, her chest moving rapidly, she was sweaty and moved her legs further up his body, letting him stay inside of her like that. –"I guess that was breakfast" he started laughing, she laughed with him, -"How do you do that?" she asked when he had helped her up and they were disconnected.

-"Do what?" he kissing her shortly on her lips, helping her down on her feet, but she was sore so she made a short facial reaction, -"Don't worry" he grinned picking her up in his arms, she laughed as he carried her into the bathroom, -"How do you, you know, make me cum?"  
She asked him while he was turning on the shower water, -"I thought you had regular orgasms?" he started laughing, -"You know how it works"  
-"Never had one with a guy" she said, not laughing back at him, Tommy turned to look at her, it made sense now, why she was content last night when he came.

-"Age" he lifted her up a bit and over on a towel, she stepped into the shower and he followed, -"You slept with many women?" she asked, -"Not really, I can count them on one hand"  
She grinned, -"What number am I then, five?" He reached her the soap, it was her soap, it smelled of lavender and berries, in the mornings when she stepped out of the shower he would follow in absorbing the scent, it was heaven.

-"Three" he corrected, not really very proud of it, in the marines all the guys would brag about how many women they have slept with and all he had to say was many lies, even if Manny knew the truth, he never told it to anyone else, they would give him hell for it.  
-"Damn" she said washing her body, soaking her hair, the wet hair stuck to her breasts, he contemplated about taking her again in the shower, but figured she must be sore enough as it is, better not push his luck.

-"You then" he turned her back to wash it, the tattoos on Jack's back where impressive, they grew from her shoulder all the way to the small of her hip, a tree, some Sanskrit writing, he wasted over them, cleaning her back, -"Seven" she said, Tommy didn't stop washing, he was just amazed over the lack of contact she must have had with these men.  
-"I'm the first to give you an orgasm then?" he grinned proudly.  
-"Yeah" she said shyly.


	4. Tommy Conlon's Jealousy

That Saturday, Jack had come with a proposal that they should go out, it was a girl at her works birthday, and she was having a celebration at a local night club, Jack worked there during the weekends to save up some cash.

Tommy wasn't much for crowds; he didn't like people in general, but anything to see Jack happy. After work he picked her up, they went to the apartment, got changed, and then went to meet this girl whose birthday it was. She was a tall, slender woman with red hair and a red lip to match, she was attractive, and Tommy wondered to himself why he hadn't noticed her before at Jack's work.

As the nightclub started filling up, the music was banging through the small spaced club leaving no reason for conversation, Tommy was dragged to the floor by Jack: he didn't really know how to dance either, his mother had tried teaching him for his prom, but he never went.

Jack pushed her small framed figure into him, her butt pocked out, grinding at him; she broke out laughing when she realized he was watching her in total amazement. Jack was a great dancer, and even if her burlesque days where over she still had it, that flair.

By the end of the night, Tommy had found himself a seat at the bar, eying Jack as she danced with her girlfriends in the middle of the crowded dance floor. Jack would cast glances at him once and a while to see if he was still looking and when he was she would move her hips slowly, throwing her hands up in the air, just to tease him.

Jack's fingers would run down her already short and tight dress, riding it up a little more, in the motion of the music. Tommy didn't feel like she was noticed by anyone else, but him, it was his private show in a room filled with strangers.

It didn't last long until a very drunk and seemingly handsome man grabbed her by the waist; whispering something in her ear that made Jack throw her head back in laughter, then she rode up on his knee, dancing to some slow rock n roll song that was playing.

Tommy flinched in his seat, waiting for his cue, to interfere, she gave him no signal to stop the guy, she was enjoying herself and the green giant in Tommy's chest just grew bigger and bigger as he observed how this guys hands rubbed up on Jack's back.

Eventually he couldn't take it anymore, he stood up and went to the bathroom, the line to the men's room was as always a hell of a lot shorter than the women's, it was none the worse about the gossip though. Two men that where standing by the urinals taking a piss where talking about Jack, how hot she was and how they wish they could fuck her, it became too much for Tommy, he wanted to hurt them.

This was the price to pay for being with Jack, Tommy knew this, he knew people would talk, men would want to sleep with her, she was easy, and that was the worst part to admit as he pushed his way back to his seat at the bar. Jack was still dancing and when the guy's hand fell on her bare thigh, Tommy snapped. Charging over at her, pulling her to him.

-"Can we go now?" Jack's carefree smile disappeared, he saw that she knew he was getting jealous, he hated this feeling of losing control so easily, over a girl of all things.  
-"Dance with me instead?" Jack smiled trying to reach for his waist, but he grabbed both of her hands, looking angry at her, -"We're going" He pulled her along the crowded dance floor, out in the summer heat of New York City.

Tommy heard Jack's friends hollering at her, asking her where she was going, she just waved a gesture at them that she was leaving. Outside of the club, in the back alley Tommy let go of her, pacing back and forth. He was angry, those words where chasing in his head of those guys in the bathroom, -"You had to wear a short dress like that" he hissed stopping, looking her up and down, Jack just crossed her arms, shooting him a look like he had lost his damn mind talking to her like that. And he had, he had lost his fucking mind over her.

-"Stop being jealous, Tommy" she rolled her eyes walking passed him, she wasn't listening, Jack wasn't even trying to understand his god damn troubles at this point, he walked behind her, taking off his dress jacket, draping it over her shoulders.

She pushed it off and shoved it hard against his chest, -"Fucking stop it, I get the jealousy act, I understand, but this is who I am, short skirt, grinding and flirting, this is me, stop trying to cover me up"

Tommy had hurt her, Jack's hazel eyes weren't flickering anymore, they were dead serious, she continued walking, her high heels clicking, her butt swaying with her steps.

-"I'm sorry, I just don't know what we are and its fucking with my head" he said after her, Jack stopped, looking back at him, -"We are friends, Tommy and friends don't pull this kind of crap on each other"

The anger was back, they where friends? –"You don't have sex with your friends on kitchen counters!" he shot back at her, -"Yes, you do, it's called being fuck buddies"

And there it was, him being the biggest idiot in the world, feeling like he wanted to slap himself, instead he did something he would regret dearly.

-"Great, I got a shot in, who's next, that guy in there?"  
Jack didn't say anything, she just stood there for a moment, almost not believing the words coming out of his mouth, then she hissed, -"Yeah, you know what, I might as well" her step got turned back to him and she marched right passed him.

Between the anger and the jealousy Tommy had lost his head, his cool, it never happened, but with her it was obvious, he was in love with this girl and she was stomping all over his heart. Tommy Conlon, the fucking victim.

-"Oh, the fucking hell you are" he grabbed her, feeling her skinny arm under his grip trying to pull away, -"Let go of me" she yelled and put all of her best affords into getting him off her, but he was stronger, so strong that his fingerprints would leave bruises and as a reaction to this she yelled at him that he was hurting her, Tommy still didn't let go.

The slap of her hand to his face didn't hurt him, instead he let her slap him as hard as she wanted and then hit his chest, he did know why, how fucking stupid could you be Tommy, he thought to himself.

He would be listening to her crying and sobbing herself to sleep that night and when he woke up the next morning, she had attached a note to his door, "Get the fuck out of my apartment, you better be gone by the time I'm back from work"

He curled up the note hitting his head hard in the door frame, fuck, he had screwed it up, he had let his anger take over and this is what happened, he had tried to make her love him.

Getting dressed he went down to a candy store, picked up her favorite liquorish stems, she loved these, he waited for closing time at the diner, just across the corner, when he saw some of the lights dimmed, he approached his target.

Tommy was never good at wooing girls, it was one thing to take them home and sleep with them, but making them love him was harder, his last relationship ended in ruins cause of it, and now he was about to lose Jack.

Tommy opened the door to the diner it clinged due to the bell above the door, Jack was distracted cleaning up on the diner counter.

-"We're closed" she said, still not turning around. –"Jack" he took a step to her, she jumped a little, pushing her back to the counter, -"What do you want?"

-"Here" he put his hand out, it was holding a bag with the liquorish in it, she observed it, took it and looked inside, cocking her brows, -"You think you can buy me off with sweets?"  
Tommy smiled, -"I don't know how to say I'm sorry"

She pulled a liquorish stem out, put it to her pink mouth, chewing on it while looking at him.  
–"I do like liquorish" she mumbled.

-"I'm sorry, we are whatever you say we are" Tommy said, hoping it wouldn't go to that.  
-"You need to stop that whole jealousy thing" she waved the liquorish stick in a circle, -"That, isn't working" Tommy nodded his head understanding.

-"Good" she said putting the bag of candy on the counter, stepping up to him, -"Don't hurt me"  
He shook his head, smiling, she had finally forgiven him, or was trying to, this made Tommy love Jack even more, she could forgive and forget, she didn't hold a grudge like he did.

That's why he needed her; he needed that kindness in his life, whatever way it must be.  
His arms didn't move to hold her when she put her head to his chest, squeezing herself into him, he was afraid to touch her.  
She grinned and kissed his lips, he could taste the liquorish on her lips, and he was lost again, lost in this girl he had met three years ago.

-"You wanna be with me then?" Tommy smiled, hoping she would say yes, Jack stopped for a moment, -"Hm, only if I get candy once and a while" He started laughing, -"I'll buy you the entire god damn store"


	5. A Counter Reaction To Pain

Tommy's life was good, his days contained in Jack trying her best to cook him a meal and Tomm returning to a kitchen filled with smoke and Jack's dissatisfied face drooping down, looking at the pot pie she had managed to burn.

He would make it up to her, by cooking her spaghetti, then taking her slowly on the kitchen table, between the moans and Jack's curses Tommy found a peace he had longed for. Tommy Conlon's life was good.

Until a Wednesday afternoon shook it up: Tommy had come home from work as usual, not seeing the kitchen burning down, but instead Jack sitting with a glass of Whiskey and some tissues curled up in her hand, she had been crying.  
Turning her head up to him, he closed the door, letting his bag drop to the floor,  
-"What happened?" The fear spread in his body, nothing made him more scared then these scenarios.

She lit a cigarette, taking a breath, putting the smoke down. –"It's Pilar" she said, holding back her tears, Tommy shook his head –"What the fuck is that suppose to mean?"  
-"Tommy sit down" Jack was back to crying, barely being able to hold onto the cigarette between her fingers, -"What happened, Jack" his voice was raw, it broke when he asked her again.  
Tommy picked up his bag throwing it across the room; -"No" he cried hysterically letting his back fall against the door, collecting his hands to his face.

–"She killed herself, Tommy" Jack cried too, falling down in front of him, trying to grab a hold of his hands to see his face, Tommy pulled Jack to him, breathing heavily into her shoulder. –"She has a son, what about Henry" Tommy sobbed, feeling her small body quiver with him, she was crying with him, sobbing harder than him, -"I'm so sorry" her body broke down as he continued to hold her.

Tommy knew that Pilar was depressed, she had been for years after Manny's death, but he never thought she would do something like this, not to her son, he felt horrible, it all came back, and he couldn't handle it.

Tommy pushed Jack away from him swiftly, -"I need a drink" he collected himself, not looking her directly in the eye, he couldn't, this was shame pouring out of his eyes, he knew it should have been him, he should have died, not Manny.

–"Please don't do this" Jack followed him as he took her glass of Whiskey, looking at the liquid in it, then at her, her whole frame was still quivering, she was afraid. Tommy wasn't used to seeing Jack scared or in pain. Not over these kind of matters, Jack was better off without carrying his pain.

Calmly he put the glass down, walking passed her to the door, she reached for his arm, but he rejected her, due to a flashback: He heard Pilar crying through the phone, when he told her about Manny's death, the woman broke down, hulking and weeping begging him to tell her it wasn't true.

-"Tommy don't do this" Jack tried holding him back, still crying, her fingers laced around the sleeve of his jacket, pulling him to her, Tommy pushed her away, opened the door and walked out, she was better off he kept telling himself, she's better off, they all where.

As he walked out, she put her small body over the door, blocking him from leaving the building; they were making a scene in the hallway, she begging him, pleading for him to stay with her, not to leave her in this state.  
-"Get out of my way, Jack"  
-"No!" she said strict, with her eyes focused, Tommy could just move her away, he could just swipe her to the side, no worries about it, she wasn't strong at all in that sense.  
-"Stay with me, I'll give you alcohol, just stay here" Jack pleaded again.  
-"Get out of my goddamn way" he shouted pushing his forehead to hers, it was a scare tactic, she didn't budge though, he knew why, Jack had been hit in previous relationships, she didn't like talking about it, but he knew from listening to her and Ruby's conversations on the phone, that it was brutal.

So he did the only possible thing he could, -"We're over" he hissed, pushing her to the side, Jack didn't respond, she knew him too well, to her it wasn't over, -"You're stronger then this" she shouted down the street from the door, he heard her loud and clear, it was her tactic, lying to him.

At the bar, Tommy drowned the voice of Pilar out of his head, the bartender there knew him from back in his "get pissed and then call Jack to pay the bill" days, he still served him though.

It began with beers then went to harder liquor: whiskey, vodka, shorts. What was he suppose to do with Henry, he promised Manny he would take care of his family His thinking was minded away when a woman sat down next to him, it was the birthday girl from a week ago, the hot red head.

Jack had explained to him earlier that her name was Nancy, she was kinda Jack's friend at work, and Nancy was a cool person in Jack's opinion. Her eyes glanced over at him, and those red lips of hers shot him a smile, -"You're Jack's beau?" she had a sharp New York accent.  
Jack had said the chick was from Jersey, but she had lived all of her life in Brooklyn.  
–"Not anymore" he drank up the rest that was in his shot glass. It was a bad idea, the mind of a drunken Tommy; he was an overly angry, horny drunk, with a big mouth, a dangerous combination he knew especially with a hot woman by his side.

One thing led to another, and they were in the men's bathroom, the hot red head with her back to his front, and her legs spread, hiking her dress up, dropping her panties.

She smelled differently then Jack did, her perfume was sweet, but only in a way that almost made him gag, he showed her no mercy: fucking her hard up against the wall of the bathroom stall. She moaned, gasped, sounding like an angry cat, all Tommy wanted to do was put his hand over her mouth and tell her to shut the fuck up.  
When he finished inside of her, he realized that he had forgotten to use a condom and that Jack would never touch him again if she found out. Jack had gotten herself on the pill, because he didn't like condoms they were difficult to put on when in heat and he wanted to feel her in every way.

Now he had ruined it, the intimacy he shared with Jack and her trust. The red head didn't seem bothered as she pushed her skirt back down, writing something on a tissue when they got back to the bar: it was her number.

-"Call me, okay" her smile was coy, the woman was gorgeous, but she wasn't Jack, Tommy sat back down again at the bar, but not for long he felt the alcohol coming back up again and ran out, throwing up everything he had drank that night, behind the alley of this bar.

When Tommy finally got back home again, Jack was asleep on the sofa, resting her head between two pillows, that's how she slept, in her own little cocoon.

Closing the door, he woke her up, she mumbled something, then sat back up, -"Tommy, you alright?" she sounded panicked, like her sleep hadn't gotten her any rest.  
–"Yeah, I'm fine, Jack" he wanted to hug her, that was all he wanted, to hold her, drag her to the shower, let the warm water pour between their naked bodies, be close to her, but he couldn't, he had to get Nancy off his body, the scent of her perfume.

Still half drunk, he got into the shower, hearing Jack shout though the door  
-"You want me to make you coffee?" Tommy threw up again, he threw up the guild, the pain and the suffering of being a total fucking loser, she wouldn't forgive him, and he started crying again, smashing the bathroom mirror when he saw his reflection.

A tapping on the door quickly caught his reaction, he realized that he was hadn't cut his hand, only ruined the mirror, -"You alright, Tommy, open the door" Jack was turning on the handle; he didn't open, just turned on the shower. –"I'm fine, Jack, please, just make me that coffee"

She didn't respond, that way he knew she had understood, the shower helped, he came into the room with the coffee smell hitting his nostrils, Jack was still sitting on the sofa with her own cup of coffee.

Her careful gaze made Tommy feel guilty all over again, she cared and she had made him a great cup of coffee. Sitting down on a comfortable chair next to her, with only a towel around his waist he sipping on the hot drink, Jack didn't say anything, clearly waiting for him to make the first move.

-"I'm horrible" he said leaning forward in the chair, trying to catch her look, she just smiled shaking her head, -"No, you're a former alcoholic and I know this is a lot for you to process, but Henry, Pilars son, you where his god father weren't you?"  
This was the difficult part Tommy had dreaded for, he was Henry's legal guardian Jack explained: Manny and Pilar had signed the kid off on Tommy, the eight year old was his now, what the fuck was he suppose to do with a child, when he couldn't even take care of himself?

He thought about this as Jack explained that she would help him raise Henry, she would be there for him, then her warm hand reached over his and Tommy was convinced he would never tell Jack of his infidelity, he would take it to his grave.


	6. When Lying Becomes Too Easy

A month into the adoption of Henry, Tommy had taken up his fighting job on the side again, he needed the money and even more he needed the gym to take his mind of the fact that a month ago, things where good.  
Pilar was alive, he wasn't a cheater and Jack and him had a good life. Jack blamed it all on him mourning for Pilar and the pressure of having to raise Henry, but it wasn't that at all, Tommy didn't want to touch Jack, not after where he had been.

She deserved better than that, to Jack's better affords she would try and seduce him: sleeping naked, he slept on the sofa most nights, because he knew she would be waiting for him.  
And other nights when she wasn't, he could feel her body pushing against his, trembling in her dreams, her sexual frustration had gone unattended far too long; it even drove him crazy as well.

In these desperate times he would hook an arm around her waistline, find his hand between her legs, into her panties, she would grind and moan, not waking up like she knew this was a dream and if she woke up it would be over. Tommy would kiss her shoulder clutching onto her thinking about a life without her, it left him sleepless.

Jack knew nothing about Tommy's on the side fighting, it would happen in the gym past nine, some old pro's would gather up around the ring, also some betters, gamblers.  
Tommy taped his hands in the thick white tape before putting the half boxing gloves on, looking at his hands, then at his opponent. They were different men each time, some where older than him, most where his age and below.  
In the ring he still had it: with one kick and another swing, they would hit the ground, the referee would call it a knock out and Tommy would get his 500 and more. The money would go to Henry's school bills, Jack had set him up in a nice pre-school, and it was perfect for him.

When they were off doing their day jobs they knew Henry would be taken care off. For Henry, he did this for Henry; he kept repeating holding onto his mothers cross as the next opponent gathered their strength, plunging at him, with kicks, jabs: Tommy would let them get one or two passed him.  
Just to hurt him, he needed this pain once and a while, if he couldn't tell Jack, then he had to make his own sentence.

Coming home every night with a half bruised face was hard to explain, but Jack wouldn't ask, she wouldn't pry, she would just pass him an ice bag, kiss his head then warm up his dinner.  
Her workload had lessened, she was only practicing for her exit exams, only two more months and she would finally get her law degree, as her glasses where on her face, her long black hair tied up in a bun, Tommy watched her. She had a yellow marker in her hand, biting the top of the lid that was united with it, looking focused. His eyes would travel from his plate of food up to her, she was smart, she was so clever, understanding, -"How did I ever get so lucky" he blurred out into the silence; it broke along with her concentration. Jack grinned and pulled her glasses down on the bridge of her nose, -"It's sexy isn't it, having a lawyer for a girlfriend"

Tommy laughed, she continued back with her work, Henry was in the living room watching some CSI, Tommy would worry sometimes that it wasn't a show for him, but Jack said that he liked it, his brain was overly developed for a six year old, he was smarter than the rest in his class.  
Henry didn't even grief for his parents when Jack explained to him that his mother was gone, he understood she was gone, he even told her they would come back for him when he died one day. It broke Tommy's heart.

When Jack closed the book, looked at Tommy's plate, he hadn't touched his food:  
-"Maybe you should see your therapist?" she suggested, trying to sound more supporting then worried, Tommy shook his head, standing up to put the dish in the sink.

-"Tommy, you're not yourself anymore, you don't eat, I know you wander about at night and we haven't had sex for over four weeks, I know it's not all because of Pilar and Henry, if you won't tell me, then tell Doctor Clarkson"  
Tommy tensed up, turning to her, she saw that he was angry, -"I'm not a goddamn revolving bull"  
-"It's not what I meant, your distant, I don't feel close to you"  
He snapped at her again; -"Leave it, Jack" walking out on her, leaving Jack sitting by the kitchen table, where they had sex before, groundbreaking, leg shaking, breath taking sex, he would be so far inside her she would quiver by the slightest movement he made, clawing at his skin, moaning in his ear, begging him, pleading at him to move, to finish what he started.

This way he had control over her, he could make her cum, now he couldn't even touch her without having the guilt flushing over him.

It went on like this, for another month, Jack tried her best, passed her first couple of exams just before summer break. When Tommy came home that night: battered and bruised.

To his surprise the apartment lights where off, only thing guiding him where lit candles, he followed the trail that led him to the bedroom, just slowly opening the door he gazed over the candle lit room, it was beautiful.

On the end of the bed, sitting there was Jack, dressed in a white laced baby doll, she had her legs crossed and a big smile on her face, -"Welcome home, baby"  
Tommy didn't know what to say, leaving his bag on the closest chair in the room he could find, taking off his jacket, -"Jack we talked about this" She kept grinning, like she was holding onto the biggest secret in the world, jumping up from the bed, pressing her tiny body into his, looking him in the eyes,  
-"You better get your guns" she kept grinning, then pulled a small green water pistol from the lining of her panties, squirting him in the face with it, Tommy broke out in laughter, then ran after her, Jack jumped back on the bed again, grabbing a bigger water gun, throwing it at him, -"Good luck, honey"  
Then ran off the bed, right passed him, Tommy laughed as he followed, taking off his shirt, only wearing his wife beater, -"Come out, Jack" he called after her checking behind the kitchen counter.

This was again typical Jack, for his 30th birthday she arranged a paintball match with some of her friends, he kicked all of their asses. –"You know you can't win"  
Out of nowhere he felt a ray of water hitting his back, soaking him wet, she had gotten a big bazooka looking water gun, with the writing: "Super waterfun" on it.  
Tommy put his hands up, he was gonna make her pay dearly for that mistake, she came closer smiling that radiant grin of hers, -"You surrender?" when she had the barrel of the water gun pushed up against his chest.  
This was his chance and just like that he grabbed it, pumping it twice then firing it directly on her chest, she giggled, shouting at him to stop it was cold, then when he did, she put her hands down. The baby doll she was wearing was soaked right through, even her hair was wet, he could see the outlines of her breasts, her stomach it was like she was naked -"Good job, I'm all wet now" she teased jumping on him, -"Let me give you a hug"

He fought against her wet arms and legs grasping a hold of his torso and waistline, face to face they fell back on the slippery floor, she kissed him, kissing him like she hadn't tasted him for a long time, not letting him pull her away, then she kissed her way down his jaw line whispering in his ear; -"Maybe you should punish me"

Tommy looked at her smiling face, he lost his grip on reality for a moment, giving in to her, kissing her with force and when he did that, everything else just followed, it felt amazing having his hands glide back up her back, tearing off the little left of clothing she had on, her panties went over the sofa, so did the rest of his clothes. As a wet, hot, mess they tangled around, with her on top.

Jack's hands around his member, stroking it, while their mouths breathed into each other, he gasped, still not hard, her lips traveled down his abs, mouth swallowing him, he looked at her as her head moved.

-"Jack" he moaned, she took it as a clue to sit back on top of him again, biting her lip, -"You gonna let me be on top this time?" she smiled leaning her head to his forehead, he didn't answer, he didn't know how. When he was inside of her, that slippery wetness covered him, her muscles tightened when she moved, it felt intense.  
Not moving her head from his, staring at him, with her mouth half open, he kissed her neck, as his hands gathered around her naked back. Her breasts on his chest, his hands on her butt, helping her push him back and forth inside of her, it was a small cry escaping from her lips the closer she got to her orgasm.  
Tommy didn't want to cum; he wanted to stay like this, looking at her cautious body moving on top of him forever, he wanted her breasts pressed to his chest, her breath to his neck, her fingers grabbed around his shoulders, his hands on her thighs and butt. She speeded up, going faster, her arms stretched on each side of his head, Jack's hair fell down on his face, she came this way looking at him, not stopping the movement still, she was waiting for him, even if it made her arms shake and her insides around him tighten up even more. –"I need you, please" she moaned with eyes wide open and pushed to him, it shook in him at first, he came inside her, not moving when it was over. They both stilled, her head on his shoulder, playing with his fingers again, he turned his head to hers kissing her forgetting for a moment what an asshole he had been. –"You should probably pull out of me" she said shyly, Tommy listened, then quickly turned her on her back, picking her up, nearly slipping on the wet floor, she giggled and held on around his neck.

On the bed they made a right mess of things, his head buried in a pillow biting down on the fabric, Jack's hands back to clawing on his back, it created a violent friction between them when she also pushed her hips up to his, in between Tommy's strong controlled thrusts, he went deeper inside of her with each time he crashed into her and when he felt her getting close he stopped, looking down at the red faced and flustered Jack. –"Don't stop" she begged, Tommy pulled out of her, -"Trust me" he said, biting her on her shoulder, tracing down her chest, kissing her breasts, biting at her nipples, she gasped when his tongue touched them.

Jack's skin was soft, warm and had goose bumps, she was moaning his named when those pillow lips of his bit her inner thigh, not hard, just enough for her to react. –"Tommy, you…you fucking tease" she laughed looking down at him; he bit her again, to reprimand her for that comment.  
He crawled back on top of her again, kissing her neck, with slow mouthful kisses, her hand traveled between his legs, grabbing at him again, stroking.

-"You gonna listen to me?" she bit her lip, stroked faster, he was losing his grip on her, and nodded his head slowly, she guided him back inside her. Jack managed to push him on his back, straddling him, -"Let's play then" she grinned, pinning his hands over his head, landing harder on top of him, moving her hips.

Tommy looked up at Jack who was grinning and casting a disoriented look down at him, -"Oh god" she moaned, grinding into him harder. She shook and shivered out an orgasm, her hair fluttering over his chest as her warm forehead rested on it,  
-"Jack" he said as she stretched out over him.  
-"I need to catch my breath" she gasped, Tommy loved the effect he had on her, she looked like a cute mess, with her face over his, trying to focus on what he was about to say. The words wouldn't leave his mouth; instead he just put his arms around her and felt her breathing against his chest.

They ended up in the tub, filled with bubbles, Jack's back to Tommy's chest, the back of her head to his shoulder, his hands on top of her knees, gliding idly over her wet soapy skin. She didn't say anything, just watched his hands, her body was tired and wrecked he could feel it by the way she was breathing slowly.

-"Your wounds better?" Jack asked, he guessed to break the silence.  
-"Jack" his hands moved around her waist, pushing her up to him a little more, getting control over her body as she straddled him, with her breasts to his chest and his hands behind her naked back, Tommy had all forgotten that he was a parent.  
-"Where is our little rascal then?" he cocked his brows, squeezing a grip of her butt, pushing her onto him, Jack's mouth opened a little looking at him with a need in her eyes. –"He's with Nancy, she wanted to borrow him, she's pregnant and practicing" Jack kissed him, but Tommy backed away, it was like a truck hit him, -"She's pregnant?"

-"Yeah, two months along" she answered, Tommy thought about it as Jack watched him, kissing him along his lips, nibbling lightly on his bottom lip.  
-"Don't worry, Henry will be fine, she won't steal him" Jack stopped looking at Tommy's worried face, he was showing clear signs of his emotions on this subject, something he had tried to hide was exposed. –"You worried about the fight Henry had in school?"

Tommy looked down at her body, her small shoulders, her butt sticking out from the soapy water, the steady movement of her fingers on his chest; he thought this must be how Brendan had it with Tess, this inner calmness and control he gave off just having someone lean on him.  
Tommy Conlon was in love with this woman laying over him, he kissed her wet hair, holding his lips there for a moment, breathing her in, if Nancy was pregnant, she must be pregnant with his child.

–"Henry called you dad the other day when we went grocery shopping, first I thought he had forgotten Manny was gone, but then he asked again, where is Tommy, where is dad, it's like he's afraid that you will leave him too"  
-"What did you tell him?" Tommy asked, Jack looked up at him with a smile, -"That he should have hit the kid in school harder for telling him that his father is gone"  
Tommy smiled back at her, -"We said we wouldn't teach him violence"  
-"It was self defense and even Doctor Clarkson said that he is looking for substitutions"  
-"You talked to Doctor Clarkson?" There were two things in this world Tommy hated: psychologists and war, and talking to Doctor Clarkson you got one in the other, she was a fucking nightmare.  
-"Yeah, I had to, you where gone at night, she's a licensed psychologist, for Christ sakes"

When she stood up from the tub and walked her wet and still soapy body out of the tub, it was a sight for sore eyes, he watched her tattooed back, her butt and those soft thighs of hers, wanting to just drag her back to the tub again and touch them.  
-"Come on then, we got some cleaning to do" her smile was sneaky, she walked into the living room, and he followed.

When Nancy came back with Henry later that night, Tommy and Jack where watching TV on the sofa, his head on her lap and her hands in his hair, he could fall asleep like this, if that door bell didn't ring, if Nancy and her pregnancy glow wernt on the other side of it.

Jack opened and Henry ran into her arms, the kid clearly didn't like Nancy very much as he clung to Jack for dear life, -"Wow, you missed me, did you" Henry then whispered something in her ear that made Jack laugh, -"Thanks Nance" she smiled at her, the woman smiled back looking at Tommy, he looked down at her stomach, she wasn't showing at all, but you saw that fucking glow women always say they get during pregnancies.

-"You mind if I borrow your man a little?" Nancy asked Jack before she closed the door, Jack just nodded and put Henry down so he could run to the TV and changed the channel. –"No Murder She Wrote" Jack yelled at him and laughed, before losing track of Tommy and Nancy, who disappeared into the hallway.

Tommy closed the door after him, pulling Nancy a bit more to the side,  
-"Your pregnant, why the hell didn't you tell me?"  
-"Because it might not be yours" she added, crossing her arms, -"I'm not about to ruin my five year relationship over a horrible fuck" Tommy cocked his brows, she had given him her number, it was probably still in the pocket of his jacket.

-"I saw how fucking happy George became when I told him I was pregnant, he pulled his shit together, for this kid" she put her hands on her belly.  
–"What if its mine?" Tommy asked, she shook her head, -"It can't be, we used a condom"  
Apparently Tommy's recollection of that night was totally different, he didn't want to say anything, instead he demanded that when the kid grew big enough she would take some tests, just to be sure that it wasn't his. He wouldn't tell Jack until he knew, he told himself as he walked back into the apartment.  
If that woman really was carrying his kid, he didn't want to think about it, she wasn't, it couldn't be his, Jack was suppose to carry his children, not some stranger.


	7. Loose Lips Sunk Our Ship (Jack's POV)

Jack woke up on a really hot summer morning, it was two weeks into her summer break, and she had taken the last of her exams, now the only thing left was to wait for the results.

She had been working at the bar on the weekends, taking Henry with her, Jack wasn't a baby person, she liked kids, she just wasn't much of a kid herself to understand them, but she loved Henry a lot, he was her little man.

Next to her slept Tommy, he had his arm stretched out covering his eyes, she snuck up to his cheek, kissed it softly then watch for a reaction, Jack was in love with Tommy, that's all she knew, so she would watch him sleeping.

His hair was ruffled, and in his sleep he looked like a child, a younger version of himself, Tommy was older then Jack, by seven years, it didn't bother her though. He didn't treat her any differently, but sometimes she could see the lines on his face. The age in the gazes that he gave her or when they had sex, he would look down at her, like he could show her the world, it didn't bother Jack at all, that he was so under her skin.

Tommy's eyes fluttered a bit open, she pulled her naked body to his: he was warm, hard and still asleep, she loved him the most like this, when he was half awake, unaware, she could do whatever she wanted to him.  
Jack's hand traveled from his chest, down his stomach and then under the white sheet that where hiding half of his lower regents. Her fingers would graze over his hard limb, just slowly, as she watched him turn his head about like it was a dream.

Jack would remember how he touched her in her sleep, she knew Tommy thought she was asleep, but she wasn't, she just missed his touch, the way his fingers knew where to roam and exactly where to push and rub. Tommy's body was warm, as she glided her fingers up and down his shaft, his face tensed up, his eyes shut open, and he stared at her, Jack wondered what he thought about her and her exposed chest, she buried her head into his neck, kissing it slowly, while stroking faster.

Tommy's abs tightened as did his grip on her back, she stopped, watching him squirm a little, breathing more heavier, -"Cum for me, babe" she whispered in his ear and continue the pace, faster and faster, till her surprise he would turn himself over on top of her, taking back the control.

Jack giggled, looking at his intensely fierce eyes, the shimmer of green and blue as his mouth went to work on her breasts, his fingers would slip inside of her, Jack moaned, grabbing a handful of his hair, pulling at it. Tommy turned her on her stomach, digging his fingers inside of her again. While his body fell heavy on her back, too her it was perfect, he felt close.

Tommy's heavy breathing in her ear; -"You feel amazing, Jack" he groaned as his hard member slipped into her, his hands backed under her hips, so he could ease his way into her.

Jack lost all figure of speech, just focused on the hardness between her legs, just not moving, she wanted him to move. –"Oh, Tommy" she whimpered with her eyes closed, he still didn't move, just bit her shoulder and made one hard thrust into her, to reach deeper. Jack moaned, clutching onto her pillow, she needed to be quite, especially since Henry was just in the room next door sleeping.

Tommy's two fingers rubbed on her clit, still not moving in and out of her, Jack's muscles clenched around him, moaning deeper into the pillow, his voice was calm and deep: -"Does it feel good?"

His soft lips traced on her shoulders, one kiss at a time, then a gentle bite, nibbling at the sides of her shoulders.  
She knew what he wanted, –"Please, Tommy, I need you, God, you feel amazing inside of me" Jack tore herself from the pillow to mutter these words, hoping he heard them, because she wasn't strong enough to say them again.

As commanded, he began moving, his fingers with his thrusts, which weren't thrusts at all, more like smooth movements, where his hips would jerk themselves in a steady rhythm into her, moving her butt in the same motion. Jack felt him completely inside of her; he had never been this deep, his chest rested on her shoulder blades, as his voice and grunts in her ear.

He put his lips to her ear, mumbling something she was too dazed to hear. His movement was quite, motioned, controlled, just like Tommy. When he stopped just as she felt him coming she knew that he was trying to make her come with him, so his fingers rubbed on her, Jack would force whatever words she could out of her mouth; -"Keep going, god, don't stop" and together like that they would come.

Tommy shook and shuttered on top of her, his seed released inside, and Jack grabbed onto his arm that was under her, laying still. She always waited for his move, that's how Tommy affected her, she wouldn't do this with anyone else, she had control with them, but with him, she had none.

Tommy's breathing slowed down, his body weight was a little overwhelming for her as it pressed her harder into the mattress, his hands freed from underneath her, as his arms trapped her under him, she turned to face him.

He was beautiful when he was all frantic and disoriented. Laying between her legs again, they where a hot mess of limbs. –"You want me to move?" he asked with his head on her chest, his body covered hers completely; she disappeared underneath him, that's how large this MMA fighter was.  
–"No, I love you like this" she answered back, stroking his hair, Tommy didn't say anything back, just closed his eyes, she wondered if he could hear her heart beat faster with him closer.

Her hands traveled over his back, like the usually did, petting his tattoos, making lines with her fingers. Tommy grunted and moved a little on top of her, she must have made him ticklish; this put a goofy smile on Jack's face, this fully grown man was still ticklish.

-"I love you, Jack" Tommy whispered, then took his hands under her body, hugging her, Jack hugged him back, pressing her cheek into his hair, breathing him in, Tommy smelled of warm aftershave and newly washed sheets.

–"I love you too, Tommy" she planted a kiss on top of his head, Tommy's body tensed, and he looked her dead in the eye, with this seriousness, -"You're not just saying that because.."she kissed him not letting him finish that sentence: hard and passionately, mouth against soft mouth, letting a moan escape from her.  
They kissed like that for a while, until he broke it up, -"Marry me then?"  
Jack laughed, -"You're kidding now?"  
Tommy still looked at her with that serious face of his, -"No, I'm serious, I might not have a ring, but I'll work for it and I'll buy you one, will you marry me, Jack?"  
She looked at this man above her, between her legs and all up in her face with this question she had never gotten before; did she want to marry him? –"Why not" she grinned and kissed him again.

She had never thought he would propose to her, but as all three of them sat around the kitchen table like a family, eating breakfast, this was all Jack ever dreamt of having. She might not have dreamt of having a wedding or a kid, but all she really ever wanted was a family and she might have found that with Tommy.

Jack was overjoyed through the day, doing the laundry thinking about what kind of ring she should ask for as she searched through Tommy's pants before putting them in the washer. Maybe it could be a small one, she didn't really want a ring, she wasn't that kind of girl, and she didn't like jewelry in general.

Maybe she could ask for something else? Her dad would always say that a woman belonged to a man, but only one strong enough for the task of making her happy, she knew Tommy only wanted to make her happy.

With her hand in his other jacket pocket, she dug out something that felt like a tissue, she looked at it, it was smudged on the sides, on it was a number, and faint lettering: "Call me"

The number was one she recognized, Jack's stomach dropped, just like it did when she heard that Pilar was dead, the panic in her began, what the hell was this, why was he calling Nancy?

Jack stormed out from the bathroom, and into their bedroom, she searched through his other things, finding nothing. Jack then sat in the living room looking at the napkin, and the writing, then she called up Nancy at the same number, the woman answered, -"Nancy" Jack's voice ran cold, she was shaking, -"Hi, Jack, whats up?"

-"Are you seeing Tommy?" The woman on the other line got quite; the no silence provided an answer for itself.  
-"Jack, listen, it was a mistake" was all she heard before hanging up.  
Nancy tried calling up a couple more times, but Jack didn't answer, she just sat there, putting the napkin on the coffee table, pacing a little back and forth, trying to calm down the shaking.

When the clock hit five and Tommy walked through the door with Henry by his side, Jack grabbed the tissues off the table, hid it from them, Henry ran up to the kitchen table,  
-"Wash your hands kid" Tommy said to him as he kissed Jack on the top of her head, before going into the bedroom.

She followed him, feeling her anger rising, then put the tissue out on the bed, Tommy had taken off his shirt, looking at the tissue then at Jack, -"Did you enjoy it?" she asked, eyes filled with tears.

-"Jack" he breathed, trying to come closer to her, but she just backed away, thinking about this morning when they had sex, how he proposed to her after, the tears rolled down her face, in that moment, Henry twisted the knob on the door, peeking his head through the crack.

Quickly Jack turned around and all Henry saw was her back, she didn't want to upset him. –"Can I eat?" he asked, Tommy nodded his head and the boy closed the door back again with a happy smile.

-"Jack, it was a mistake, I was drunk, hurt and I felt like shit" Tommy explained, but it wasn't good enough, she turned to him, -"You're a goddamn liar, a fucking liar" he tried to come closer again and she let him, only so she could plant the palm of her hand forcefully against his cheek, slapping him.

–"This has all been a fucking lie" she bit her bottom lip to stop herself from sobbing. –"No, it hasn't, I love you Jack, I love you" he repeated, she just hit him again, harder this time, -"The kid she's carrying, is it yours?" Tommy put his hand to her, she slapped it away, -"It is isn't it, you two have been fucking around behind my back, lying to me and to George?"  
-"Jack, please"  
-"No!" she shouted, gripping her fists together, so she wouldn't raise her voice more,  
-"You're apologies are on deaf ears now" She was about to walk out when he put his hand in front of the door, -"I'm not letting you leave, it was a mistake, the kid might not even be mine"  
-"Listen to yourself, just listen" she said, feeling disgusted, pulling his hand down, but Tommy didn't give up, he grabbed her by her wrists and pinned her to the door.

-"I love you, I know you love me too, I fucked up, Jack, this time I really fucked up, I was scared, I know I'm a coward, I'm not as strong as you, that's why I need you in my life, you're my anchor, you hold me down and you keep me up"

Jack calmed down a little after that was said, looking at him still with her brows arched, she knew him best this way, the strong and careful Tommy Conlon, he was kind by heart, but he had betrayed her.

-"I don't love you, how can I love you when you are this fucked up that you would hurt someone you say you love" His grip around her wrists tightened, -"You're angry, you're allowed to be, I know you love me Jack, I can feel it" he pinned her a little bit rougher to the door as his lips aimed at hers, touching them barely, she wanted to move her head, but she couldn't, she didn't want to, she wanted this, she wanted him.

Tommy's lips touched hers, kissing her, while her tears rolled, he was trying to comfort her in the best way he knew how, letting his hands fall from her wrists, grabbing her by her butt and hiking her up around his waistline. Still pinned her in place up against the door, he kissing her, letting her small body cry and shake along his.

-"I hate you" she cried, grabbing onto his naked back, -"I know, Jack, I hate me too" he responded, she felt that he was crying too, his tears against her neck as he breathed her in.  
They could hear the TV from behind the door, the sound of the TV broke their world up, shuttering them with reality on what they should do now.


	8. Life Without Hart

The next couple of mornings Tommy couldn't even drag his body out of bed; he had no strength to go to work, even if he had to. For Henry's sake, he kept repeating to himself as he stood in the shower letting the water pour down his back.

It was his fucking temper that had ruined everything, his self loathing; Tommy's fist flew into the bathroom tiles, as he held his hands up against the wall, water clouding his hearing and vision. He was lost without Jack, in reality this was all he had to hold onto, except for Henry. Brendan suggested that he should probably talk to Nancy, make sure she was alright with the kid. When this bomb blew up, it really blew up, Nancy's boyfriend George still was in the loop, but everyone else knew, Nancy made sure of that.

Tommy went back into the bedroom after his shower, opening the closet, Jack's clothes where gone, the only thing she had left behind was his shirt, the one she used to wear to bed sometimes, it still smelled like her. Tommy put it to his face into the fabric; this was what he had feared from the very beginning, losing Jack all together; as a friend and a girlfriend.

Tommy had not only disappointed her, but also with what he had promised Brendan that he was okay with his addiction, he wasn't.

In the weekends he would drink, first starting off with a beer, and then when Henry was in bed, he would hit the harder liquor. Drunk and sleepy he would tag along into his own bedroom, roll over to Jacks side of the bed and pretend she was laying there with him. It was the only way he could fall asleep.

Tommy was a wandering zombie after the week she left him, and as October ended, so did his common sense, Henry was doing badly in school too, he missed Jack just as much as Tommy, but Tommy tried his best to keep the kid happy.

Taking him wherever he wanted, and wherever Tommy went he saw girls that reminded him of Jack, at one point Tommy almost scared a poor woman half to death, by grabbing her by her shoulder and turning her around, calling her Jack.

In his drunken state he would call Jack's sister, asking her if he could just talk to Jack, just for a moment, but Jack didn't want to talk to him. She had quit working at the diner, nightclub and moved all the way into Brooklyn, at times she would stop by Henry's school just to check on him. Henry would tell Tommy about this, so Tommy stuck around Henry's school before class, seeing maybe if could catch a glimpse of her. He never did.

By the end of New Years Eve, Tommy had been forced by Brendan to go back to AA meetings, they threatened to take Henry from him, and Tommy cleaned up his act once Nancy gave birth to a little girl, named her Roxanne in January.

After the paternity test was done, it proved that the little girl wasn't Tommy's, she was George's, and to Nancy's relief that was good news, but to Tommy it was too late. He was tempted to tell George about Nancy's infidelity, he didn't though; he wished her luck and moved on.

By February, Tommy took Henry to Brendan's house, so he could play with his nieces, they all asked for Jack, where she was. Usually Tommy would bring her with him, but now explaining that Jack had left was the hardest part.

Tommy looked at his big brother as they sat outside watching the kids running around in the snow, it was the coldest February they have had in years. Brendan looked at his brother, sipping at his coffee:  
-"You still fight?"  
-"Yeah, I need to support Henry somehow, his school is expensive" Tommy answered, it just reminded him that Jack picked that school out for Henry and he didn't want to take that away from Henry, just because it cost too much.

-"He hates me you know" Tommy said with a stiff upper lip, trying not to let it be shown how fucking hurt he was, -"No, he doesn't, he's just used to Jack, he'll get used to a life without her"  
-"I don't blame the kid, I can't live without her either" Tommy took a drag from his cigarette, everything reminded him of her.  
-"She broke your heart bad, bro" Brendan shook his head, -"No, she did nothing wrong, I cheated, she had every right to leave, I just don't know how to live without her"

For the first time in his life Tommy understood why his brother didn't have the strength to leave Tess for him, he loved her just as much as Tommy loved Jack, but Brendan did the right thing by Tess, he married her, build a home with her. –"You need to be careful with the fighting Tommy, you're not young anymore" Brendan said, Tommy just nodded his head, it didn't really matter to him if he got injured.

-"Maybe you should consider dating again" before Brendan even could finish that sentence Tommy asked him to not even go there, -"I don't want any other women, Brendan, she was it" Tommy put his cigarette out and shouted that Henry should come back in again and leave the girls to their own devises.

They were leaving with the night train, and if they where gonna catch it, he needed to go now.  
–"You should get yourself a fucking car too" Brendan laughed as he watched his brother fumble with Henry's jacket. –"Don't have the money for it"  
-"Take dad's, I know he gave you the house, but you haven't sold it, I'll trade you" Tommy looked at his brother, -"Man, that car is in horrible shape and I'm not selling dad's house"

Henry asked a billion questions like always, but this time about Paddy, he asked Tommy why he died, who he was, why they couldn't take his car, it all became too much for Tommy, so much that he had to ask Henry to stop asking. It wasn't something he wanted to talk about, he could talk about his father's death, but that car and the house, was all he had of his mother. He wasn't ready to leave her behind.

The gym was Tommy's sanctuary; he didn't have to think about Jack or his responsibilities when he was there: it was just a boxing bag, him and all the time in the world to get the aggression out.

There would be women there, watching him sometimes, probably waiting for their boyfriends or husbands, he would just blandly ignore them, walk past as he heard their conversation about how he was in Sparta, how he lost against his brother and everything.

Tommy jumped passed the ropes of the ring. He was practicing with this guy, just an ordinary sparring lesson; the judge between them was the guy's trainer.

Before the poor man could even move, Tommy was all over him, jabbing him, hitting him so hard that they had to drag him off. It was the anger, and between the anger and hatred, he saw her standing at the end of the ring: Jack, she was smiling and waving at him.

Tommy felt a pull around his body that hit him to the ground with a thud, and everything around him faded, he blacked out, it was the guy he had punched he had blindsided him, got him when he was distracted. This was the first lesson Paddy ever taught Tommy: Distractions only lead to loss.

Tommy woke up in the emergency room, with an ice bag on his head and a female doctor by his side noting something down, -"Mr. Conlon, can you hear me?"  
-"Yeah" he was more dazed now than ever, fading his eyes back and forth to try and catch the room that was spinning around.  
-"My son" he muttered, -"What time is it?"  
-"Five thirty" she answered.

Tommy blew out of the hospital bed, only to get stopped by some of the nurses, -"You need to lay down, Mr. Conlon, you have suffered from a very serious concussion"  
-"My son, he's at school, I need to call him" Tommy's voice was weak, and he felt like throwing up, the nurses helped him back into the bed, -"It's alright, your wife has your son" the doctor answered as she smiled kindly.

He must have hit his head real bad, because he swore that he heard her say wife.  
–"They have been waiting for you" the doctor added as she walked to the door, opened it and out ran Henry , up to Tommy, -"Did you beat that guys ass, dad" he jumped up and down, Tommy cocked his brow looking at the kid, -"No, Who brought you here?"

-"Mom came here for me" Henry smiled and turned his head to the door, this time he wasn't hallucinating, Jack stood there, her hair was different, a bit longer and lighter.  
–"He has limited visitation rights, so 15 minutes" the doctor patted Henry on the head then walking passed Jack with that same understanding smile, the other nurses followed the doctor.

-"Hi" Tommy said, realizing he must look horrible to her, she came up to his bedside, taking Henry's hand, -"I'll look after him while you get better" was all she said.  
–"Jack" he called after her with a small desperation in his voice.

–"Go to the candy machine, but come right back, okay" she said to Henry pulling him out a dollar, he ran for dear life out the door and down the hall.

Jack turned back to him, -"What do you want?" she was cold, not as bubbly and free as she used to be, Tommy felt even more horrible and sure that this was because of him. –"I miss you, Jack"  
-"I'm leaving now" she said as a response, -"The kid wasn't mine" he added, this was him at his most desperate, he would take anything he could get for a reaction, -"Yeah, I know, congratulations" she said just as bland as before.

-"Could you come back, have a coffee with me?" Tommy asked, it was unlike him to try this hard, but for her he would peel his own skin off is she asked him, -"Look Tommy, we decided it was best not to make any scenes or confuse Henry, so let's just leave it at that"

-"Jack, please, I let you go because you asked me too, I didn't want to, I love you"  
Her eyes filled up with tears, Tommy could see she was just trying to be as tough, act cool as him, but really she wasn't strong at all, Jack wanted to hug Tommy, she wanted to kiss him and she wanted him back. Her life sucked without him.

-"Don't make this anymore harder than it has to be, Tommy" she said, then he stood up, even in his dizzy haze, he forced himself on his feet, walked to her as she tried fighting the tears.  
–"Come back to me" his hands on her shoulders, he missed them there; he missed the touch of her body. Jack pushed herself a little back from the door as she felt it moving, it was Henry, he was back, -"We have to go" Jack sniffled as Tommy stood there, watching her leaving the same way she came.


	9. You'd Never Let Me Go

After an overnight stay in the hospital Tommy was back home again. Henry mentioned everything he had done with Jack and Tommy listened carefully, asking the boy if she was alright, Henry told him that Jack would cry sometimes, just out of the blue, Ruby, he sister would explain to Henry that heartbreak does that.

Everything changed one afternoon when he was in the market with Henry shopping, Tommy saw Jack behind an aisle with a tall blond haired man, rolling a grocery cart laughing and joking around.

Henry stood beside Tommy, just as stunned; in Henry's mind Jack was someone he had grown rather fond of going as far as to be calling her mom, when the other kids asked him if he had one.

Before Tommy could grab the little upset boy's hand, he ran down the aisle they were standing at, Tommy hollered after him: -"Henry, come back, Henry"

When Tommy realized the kid ignored his cries, he ran after him, trying to track him down. The search seemed useless as Tommy towered between the aisle of fruits and vegetables.  
–"Shit" he cursed more panicked now, swiping his hand over his hair, looking around, even going so far to ask people if they had seen Henry.

This was a pretty big store and Henry was still a small kid and it worried Tommy.  
-"Henry" he kept shouting out, then felt a hand on his back, turning around he saw Jack.

-"What happened, where is he?" she sounded just as worried as him, Tommy shook his head still panicked, -"He just ran off, I can't find him"  
Behind Jack stood the tall blond guy, he saw the hesitation in her face if she should introduce them to each other, so Tommy just did the mature thing, stuck his hand out and looked at the blond man.

The guy took Tommy's hand in a hard grasp, shook it and introduced himself as Mitchell, this to Tommy's big surprise was Jack's older brother Mitchell, he had never met the guy before, but he knew from stories that her oldest brother was an ex con and by the looks of his neck tattoos and coy behavior he was exactly that. –"I lost my son" Tommy explaining to him, Mitchell just nodded his head, -"My baby sis told me about you, I know about Henry"

Tommy couldn't help to smile just a little thinking that Jack had mentioned him, before turning his face back to its serious origin. The group of three decided to split up, Tommy asked the people around the store, Jack asked a cop if he could call it in, warn the other cops in the mall if they maybe could keep an eye out.

Jack sat on the hood of her brother's car with a nervous look on her face, biting her nails, only to feel her brothers hand creep over her shoulder, -"He's gonna be okay, you used to run away from home all the time"

-"He's six years old" she was close to tears, and when Tommy returned just as angry at the cops as he could be, he felt frustrated that they hadn't found Henry yet.

Jack stood up from the hood of the car, walking up to him, -"I'll help you look, we got a car"  
-"What if I can't find him" Tommy said looking at her with this panic and fear, Jack had never seen that on him, fear for others safety.  
-"Don't think like that, we'll find him" she nodded her head reaching her hand to his, Tommy looked down at their connected union, he wanted to hug her so badly to make him forget this situation.

Instead their moment got interrupted by Mitchell excessive honking of his car horn and that's how their night started, they drove around the mall, calling the cops again for reports, then they hit the parks and walked trails.

By 12 o clock at night, they had searched half of central park, still not being able to find him. Jack was close to tears when Mitchell suggested they call it a night, Tommy didn't know what to do with himself, he just wanted his kid back home again, he couldn't lose Henry the way he lost Jack.

Tommy kept walking around the closest blocks to the places he knew Henry might be, he was just a six year old boy, but he traveled pretty frequently around New York City, at least around their blocks.

The 24 hour notice was still not up on Henry; this made Tommy go through a sleepless night, canceling his job for the day and returning back to looking for Henry.

Jack called him on his cell so she could meet him half way for coffee; they sat down by the park.

It was a beautiful March morning, still cold as hell, Tommy wondered if Henry was freezing, if he was cold, he remembered he had bought him a good jacket, which cost him a fortune, but now he didn't regret it.

Tommy's gaze was empty as Jack tried to give him a bagel, -"You need to eat something, we can't search for him with an empty stomach"

First Tommy thought he heard her wrong, -"We?"  
-"Yeah, I cancelled my client's for today, so I can help you look for him, he is my kid too you know" she said, reminding him that she signed the co-responsibility for Henry with the adoption papers.

-"I can't eat" Tommy put the bagel down on the bench next to him, along with the coffee, standing up, ready to go and look again. Jack stood up too, -"We can split up, you take the east, I'll take the west, call me alright, if you hear anything"

His glances passed over at her, she really was amazing, even after all the shit he had put her though she still stuck around for Henry's sake. Tommy snapped out of it, knowing she saw him looking for too long, -"Yeah, I'll talk to you later"

They split up, looking everywhere around central park again, Tommy must have covered the entire west side of New York by five o clock, his legs felt like they were gonna fall off. At one point he thought he saw Henry in some kid on the end of a café, he had Henry's jacket, when he caught up to the kid, he saw it wasn't him this made Tommy feel more hopeless.

Jack broke down crying when the police called her saying they had registered Henry as a missing person, she kept repeating over and over again to them that he was just a six year old boy, he never harmed a fly, he was smart, he would be easy to find.

Ruby and Mitchell had to give her some sedatives to calm her down after the phone call; Jack had no strength in her to tell Tommy that Henry might not come back. She dialed his number with shaky hands, putting the phone to her ear, hearing a ringing sound, and then a tired, dark murmur of a voice answered at the other end.

-"Tommy" she said holding back the tears, -"They have registered him as a missing person, he's on their lists" she paused, not hearing anything on the other end. –"They said the chances were slim for finding him the longer he was missing.." at those words she started crying, -"Dear God, Tommy please find him, I can't lose him" Jack felt her sisters arms embrace her, as Tommy's voice broke at the end of the line, -"I'll find him Jack, I promise" then he hung up.

–"He's six years old, Ruby" she looked at her sister as she took the phone away from her, hugging her, -"I don't know what I'll do if I lose him, he's my kid!"

To Tommy this was just another test in life, he had gone through the desert of Afghanistan, without food or water for days, saved solders from burning tanks, gone through hell with his father's abuse, lost his mother, then Jack to his stupidity. He wasn't going to lose Henry, he promised Manny he would look after his son.

Ruby picked Tommy up an hour after his conversation with Jack on the phone, she drove him to her apartment where Jack was sitting outside on the open rooftop with a glass of whiskey in one hand and a smoke in the other.

Seeing her like this broke his heart: Tommy dropped his jacket down on one of the small chairs next to where she was standing looking over the night sky. His hand rested on her shoulder, squeezing lightly to signal her that she wasn't alone.

Jack didn't back away, just let him stand next to her, it was still cold, and their breaths could be sensed in the air along with Jack's cigarette. –"I'd offer you one" she put her glass up, letting her tears roll. Tommy stood up, grabbing her by her hand, letting her head crash into her chest; she started sobbing, barely holding onto the things in her hand as they stood there in the middle of her sister's small garden roof top in the cold March night.

Tommy's arms tightened around her, pushing her head forcefully against his chest, kissing the top of her head, -"It will be alright"  
Jack's soft crying turned into sobbing, then hulking, painful hulking, -"I just want him back, Tommy, I want our kid back"

-"I know, I want him back to" Tommy had to stop his own emotions from taking over so he eased his way from her body, only to notice that she was holding onto him, not letting him leave her.

-"I can't be close to you like this" she shook her head, -"I know" he answered, Jack turned her head to him. Tommy casted a look away from her, making his way back into the apartment, then stopped.

–"I love you Jack, I have been walking around with this in my pocket since the day you left" he pulled out a small ring, it wasn't anything fancy, but to him it was Jack, -"I'm still here, that might count for something" he put the ring on a table he passed.

Jack walked over to the edge of the rooftop with her back to him not responding to him, Tommy didn't know what more he could do or say. He knew their relationship was over; all he had now was Henry, if he was still alive.

Tommy crashed on Ruby's sofa, it was small and uncomfortable, and he woke up many times in the middle of the night with Henry's image on his mind.

With his head in his hands, Tommy gave off a quite cry, letting himself weep, remembering how Henry told him that Jack would also cry at night, Tommy wondered if Henry was scared, hungry or alone. A light from the kitchen caught his attention, he sniffled, dried off his tears with his hands, looking over, it was Ruby. Jack's older sister was a spitting image of Jack, except for she had black dark hair, matching down to her ears, cut in a slick bob. –"Can't sleep?" Ruby asked passing him a glass of milk, Tommy took it, thinking how nice it would be to have a sister.

She sat down next to him on the sofa, Ruby was an adult, she was around his age, 33, and you could see it by her night gown and slippers that she was well put together. Her wedding ring on her finger, but no husband in site.

–"Where is Daniel?" he asked her. –"He's overseas, that's when happens when your husband is an engineer" she sipped out of her glass, she wasn't drinking just milk, she was drinking a white Russian, Tommy could notice it by the thinness of the drink.

–"He left you, didn't he" Ruby nodded her head giving off a sad smile, -"Yeah, a year ago, I guess it's easier to tell people he's off at business then the fact that I wasn't good enough for him, the curse of the Hart women, I guess"

After finishing his glass of milk with Ruby, she went off to bed, Tommy couldn't sleep though he just lay flat on his back staring up at the ceiling wondering if Henry was asleep now.

His thoughts were disturbed by a pair of feet on the wooden floor, it was early in the morning, and he wasn't expecting anyone to be up yet. There she was: Jack; Tommy pretended to be asleep, not moving his body, just listening to her opening the kitchen cabinets.

He wondered what the hell she was looking for, when he heard a lid pop off he knew, this was the most familiar sound Tommy had ever known: drugs, pills.

That nostalgic sound brought back memories he had tried to force back into his mind, Tommy stood up and suddenly Jack retrieved a little from her goal, clearly hiding the pills behind her back.

-"You're awake" she said, putting on a fake front, Tommy stood up walked over to her, grabbing her by her arm, pulling it away from her back, exposing the classical orange bottle with a white cap.

-"You're on drugs now?" he said shaking her hand so she would release the bottle into his, Tommy didn't let go of the drugs when she tried reaching after them again. –"Go on, Jack, tell me a lie"  
Jack had been there for Tommy though his rehab, relapse and everything in-between; she wasn't an addict like him, no way. Her body pulled away a little from his, the sadness clouded her eyes, -"I can't sleep, I have insomnia, they help me"

-"I can't sleep either Jack, doesn't mean I drug myself down" Tommy responded, Jack looked down, shaking her head, -"You don't know what this is about, just give me the pills and go back to sleep"

Her hand tried reaching for the pills again, this time Tommy grabbed it, pulling her simultaneously against him in one swift motion, Jack tried moving away, to no use. –"Is it because of me?" he asked looking down at the love of his life. No matter if Jack was tired, in her pajamas, hair all messed up, she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, it painted a goofy grin across his face; -"You want me to sleep with you?"

This was their world, as far as Tommy saw it, nobody saw this little bubble of emotions happening in the kitchen, just them in the morning, standing in her sister's kitchen, pressed against each other.

–"Come on, Jack, you're in no position to fight me on this" he said putting the pills on the counter, taking her hand. Jack was too tired to fight him; Tommy sat down on the sofa, letting her fall on his body. Covering her with the blanket he had gotten. Jack's body under his fingertips, her breasts pressed themselves into his chest, her legs braded around his and her head where its place always had been: on his shoulder. Tommy laced his fingers into hers, the other hand he placed firmly on her back, pressing against her spine, like he couldn't get her close enough to him.

-"This doesn't change anything" she muttered half asleep, pressing her lips to his neck, Tommy just smiled to himself while stroking his large hand over her back in a calm motion.

They fell asleep like that for a couple of hours until they where awoken by Mitchell, who was shaking Jack's body violently with the palm of his hand to her back: -"Jack, Tommy, wake up, they found Henry"


	10. Finding A New Type Of Fear

Fast as they could Tommy and Jack ran down the hospital corridors, hand in hand, Tommy held himself together as bravely as he could when Jack squeezed his hand as they arrived by; room 318, that's where Henry was.

When they got to the room, Jack started crying, Henry was hooked up to all sorts of machines, his forehead was bandaged up, the doctor explained that he run infront of a car and had been admitted to the hospital two days ago, his condition had not changed. They were ordered to be prepared for the worst: that Henry might not make it.

After hours by Henry's side, Ruby had gone home with Mitchell, they where off to get some clothes for Jack, both Tommy and her asked if they could stay in the hospital, to be near their child, the doctor had assured them that Henry would be alright with them, but Jack was persistent like always, telling the doctor that she didn't want to leave him alone.

So they stayed behind, sitting in the church chapel, it was the only quite place in the entire hospital. Jack was asleep on Tommy's lap, with her head on his jacket, nose pressed against his stomach and her hand clutching onto his. She was scared; he knew she was and god knew Tommy was terrified as well. Her ring finger was baring the engagement ring he had given her, with the lilac stone, it wasn't any fancy ring, but when he saw it, he saw Jack; it was radiant, alive and wild.

Tommy looked down at the sleeping woman on his lap, draping the blanket one of the nurses gave them over Jacks shoulders, she was peaceful, looking like she had never seen sleep before. Soaking it up, not releasing her grip around his fingers, his other hand stroked her hair and her forehead, gently so he wouldn't wake her.

Taking a deep breath then facing his look at the altar: there was a huge mosaic picture of Jesus hanging on the cross with his parents and other disciples around him, on the wall at the end of it.

Tommy was never religious; his mother died a good Catholic woman, she raised him to pray, the only thing he had left of her was a small silver cross, which he wore most days. After her death, Tommy couldn't make himself trust or love God, even if he prayed to him sometimes; the spite against God slipped his mind when he remembered her. –"Ma, you have to take care of Henry, bring him back to us" he whispered looking around the church, -"Just bring me my kid back"

Tommy watched over Jack, seeing over her, making sure she was alright all the way through the night, the peace got disturbed when one of the nurses called a code blue, Tommy knew what that meant. Jack was shaking under his arm as they watched the doctor and nurses put Henry's life back into his body after his heart had stopped working.

The machine's made a non static sound, Jack cried in as she pressed her hands to the glass, hitting the glass, -"Wake up, Henry, Wake up" the cries where desperate, and Tommy had to pull her into him to make her stop. –"It's okay, Jack" Tommy's hand was over her head shielding her from the view of them having to cut Henry open in a last attempt to save his life.

She didn't take her eyes off Henry's body on the table, even as they broke his chest open, retracted a request to operate on him, closing the doors and the blinds to the window Jack and Tommy where standing behind. Tommy didn't know how to behave or react to what had just happened, he didn't leave the spot he was standing in, just resting his hand against the glass, praying to God, to his mother, anyone that would listen to his prayers.

Jack was given a sedative by one of the nurses, lying in a hospital bed just across Henry's room, Tommy came in and Jack made room for him. His body weight moved the bed a little, pushing her up against him on the small bed. Jack's head rested on Tommy's wide chest, his hand over the side of her head, holding her there.

–"My brother, Mitchell's twin, Joshua, got himself killed when I was about Henry's age" Tommy listened in the empty tones of her words, like she was speaking about a stranger. –"Joshua was seven"  
Tommy didn't know this, he had never heard Jack say these words before, -"I'm sorry, Jack, if we lose Henry too" Tommy's eyes teared up, Jack nodded her head kissing his cheek softly, then putting her head back on his chest again.

Tommy Conlon's life changed when he was seventeen and he lost his mother to the cancer that eat her lungs away, he would pray to God to ease her mind, he bundled her up at night when the radiator failed and to keep them above ground he would fight on the streets for money.

That's how he ensured his family's well being, by getting the shit beat out of him, then learning how to beat his enemy, going back and hitting them where it hurts. Paddy would tell him to keep it up, don't give up until you get what you want, those words had trained Tommy into something he couldn't give up: being a fighter.

His head in the game, the hot sweat tippling down his forehead biting on his eyes, a body, that's all he saw in his way, someone he could beat and get what he wants out of. Money, honor, win, never lose. Between the swings, and shots turned to his opponent Tommy's father's words would play in his head: "Jab, duck, watch the foot work kid, duck, jab, uppercut, kick"

The judge and some of the assistant coaches would have to tear Tommy away from the limp body on the ground after that was spoken. Tommy's breathing was intense, the sweat drip down his chest, hands tearing him away from the unconscious man on the floor. Nobody would say a word after this was done.

Fighting was all Tommy Conlon knew, it helped with the nightmares, it helped with the anger, the only thing it never helped against was the pain and here he was on the church altar, knees to the floor, hands folded, head bend down, praying the only prayer his mother ever taught him:  
"Bless us for today's events, forgive us for our sins as you do others, keep us safe even though we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, we fear no evil, for You are with us, you loved us at our darkest, dear lord!"

No matter how many times Tommy Conlon would repeat the prayer; she never came back, once the light in her died the same one that was dying in Henry.  
-"Tommy" Jack whispered calmly as she shook his shoulder, he rolled over on his back, seeing her bloodshot eyes, she'd been crying, Tommy's stomach dropped, he felt the panic that had dragged him through his sleep return, but in reality.

-"Is he gone?" His voice was sharp, Jack didn't answer she just swallowed, sat down on the bed next to him, -"They want us to make a decision, if he's to be taken off life support or not"  
Tommy could hear the words out of Jack's mouth, he could even feel them all over his body, he just didn't want to understand them so he shook his head looking at her confused, -"Are you kidding me, he's been on the respirator for a week, they said he was going to be alright, they said he was fine"

Jack started crying again, -"Tommy, his lungs are caving in on him, he's in a lot of pain" Tommy stood up from the bed, shaking his head, -"No, I promised Manny, I said I would keep him safe, they can't do this" Jack's frail body made its way to him, her face changing to his mothers, -"It's alright sweetheart, I'll take care of him, I promise, he's with your dad and me now, in hell"

Tommy grabbed the woman before him by her shoulders, pushing her away. –"You are not real, this isn't real" Tommy hissed, and then awoke back in the hospital bed he had fallen asleep in with Jack.

Except for he woke alone, Jack wasn't there, he looked around in the half lit room, -"Jack" he said in a desperate panic, making his way up to the door, down the hospital hallways to where Henry's room had been before, and like he though seeing Jack sitting by Henry's side, he was awake.

-"Oh dear God" Tommy gasped holding onto the side of the door, looking at Henry like it was a miracle. Jack just smiled at him, -"I didn't want to wake you, he woke this morning"  
-"Hi kid" Tommy sat down on the other side of Henry's hospital bed, taking his hand, Henry still looked a bit woozy and out of it, but he smiled at Tommy, his head was bandaged up, but he was off the breathing machines. Henry was alive!


End file.
